God hates divorce because it tears apart a covenant of love designed to reflect His own faithfulness. Divorce often brings betrayal, injustice, and deep wounds to those He loves. Yet God does not hate divorced individuals. The key scripture is Malachi 2:16: “For I hate divorce, says the LORD God of Israel.” Understanding the context is important. In Malachi’s time, the prophet confronted men who were faithlessly divorcing “the wife of your youth,” their covenant companion, often in order to marry other women. Their actions produced tears at the altar and were linked with violence and treachery.
Marriage should be seen as a promise to love another person unconditionally. Divorce, therefore, is a violation of that covenant and stands against godly principles. God’s hatred of divorce is not arbitrary; it targets covenant betrayal and injustice. When divorce occurs, it breaks something intended to be a living sign of faithful, self-giving love, causing pain to spouses, children, and communities. It can also become a means of discarding a person when they become inconvenient. God despises that.
Nevertheless, this does not mean He condemns everyone who has been divorced. Jesus pointed out that Moses allowed divorce because of human “hardness of heart” (Matthew 19:8). He justified divorce only in cases of fornication (Matthew 19:9 KJV), where the truth was not revealed during the engagement to marry. Paul also provided an exception in cases of abandonment by an unbelieving spouse (1 Corinthians 7:15).
Many Christian traditions hold that abuse and danger can justify separation or divorce, though this prevents the divorced spouse from remarrying as long as the former spouse is still alive. The heart of the matter is that God hates divorce because of its consequences: the breaking of covenant, betrayal, pain, and injustice. He loves marriage as a space for faithful love, and He extends grace, forgiveness, and healing to divorced individuals.
The issue of dealing with seemingly unworkable marital problems may extend to nonbelievers as well. Courts are equipped with legal provisions to facilitate divorce proceedings, but the resulting toxic environment often persists. Better solutions are found outside the legal system. The Apostle Paul recommends that converts remain in the state they were in at the point of conversion.
If one is married, divorce is not advised. If one is not married, it is best to avoid complicating one’s Christian calling by engaging in marital issues. Christianity leaves no room for divided attention; one is better off unmarried than becoming entangled in marriage troubles while pursuing Christianity. The entire chapter of 1 Corinthians 7 addresses matters regarding marital disputes. Can a Christian conclude that their marriage has become unworkable?
Jesus asserted that marriage cannot be terminated except by death. Although some argue that certain marriages cannot be sustained, Jesus implied that, under normal circumstances, it is impossible to end a marriage. True love, as reflected in marriage, is sustained through empathy and forgiveness, which help spouses maintain hope even in challenging environments. There is no provision for divorce within the institution of marriage.
Some Pharisees came to him to test him. They asked, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?” “Haven’t you read,” he replied, “that at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,’ and said, ‘For this reason, a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.” “Why then,” they asked, “did Moses command that a man give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?”
Jesus replied, “Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning. I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery.” The disciples said to him, “If this is the situation between a husband and wife, it is better not to marry.”
Jesus replied, “Not everyone can accept this word, but only those to whom it has been given. For there are eunuchs who were born that way, and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by others—and there are those who choose to live like eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. The one who can accept this should accept it” (Matthew 19:3–12 NIV).
The abnormal environment normalizes the abnormal. In Christianity, divorce cases are classified among abnormal misdemeanors, thereby indicating toxic survival conditions. A husband and wife are one in marriage, making their separation impossible. The thermometer of a good nation is measured by the level of divorce cases in that environment. The more divorce cases there are in an environment, the more toxic the nation becomes.
Jesus is the standard for healthful living conditions. When desiring to pursue normal lives, Jesus’ words hold workable standards for healthful living conditions. All other formulae are unworkable. The sexual appetite was designed for properly constituted marriages. The gift of sexual enjoyment includes the responsibility of embracing the sanctity of marital conditions. The first time a person engages in sex, one would have committed him- or herself to marriage.
Such a sexual engagement could be committed by school children, doing so without realizing the responsibility that goes with it. That kind of sexual activity is termed fornication, carried out by young people out of mischief. Such youths do so without realizing the responsibility involved. The law of cause and effect brings consequences, regardless of immaturity and ignorance. Others get caught up in child pregnancy, yet others may not be impregnated. They would have violated their chastity, yet without any marriage to talk about.
When traditionally getting married, yet having had experience in fornication, the intended marriage becomes void. That is, if the person marrying such a woman would be Christian. When allowing that marriage to proceed, disregarding Jesus’ teaching, the couple would be committing adultery. Such a union lacks the dignity of being classified as a marriage. It requires termination at the point of discovering the breach. What should then happen to the naive youths, having ignorantly experimented with sex? Their primary sexual conduct would have spiritually validated their commitment to marriage.
Spiritually, it becomes impossible to marry a different spouse, other than the defiled fornicator. Such individuals are cleared only if the other fornicator dies. But even death does not absolve the survivor from confessing before marrying the other person. Otherwise, the solution would be to connect with the childhood fornicator and be united in marriage. Their first sexual engagement in fornication would have sanctified their marriage.
Any other hobnobbing in sexual activities, whether with married people or not, would be adultery, which would be abominable to God. This is what was intended by Jesus when stating: “I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery” (Matthew 19:9). The Authorized King James Version renders it accurately: “except it be for fornication.”
In summary, Christians cannot justify divorcing a spouse based on adultery. This discussion is not intended to regulate marital behavior but rather to provide clarity for those seeking to follow the tenets of true Christianity. Divorce and infidelity continue to plague Zimbabwe, and this presentation aims to guide individuals toward inner peace by adhering to Jesus’ teachings.
Regarding whether Christians can marry a non-virgin, the answer is not a straightforward “no.” It is essential to discuss and clarify the circumstances before entering into marriage. Some individuals may have experienced rape during their youth, particularly during Zimbabwe’s liberation war. Others might be widowed or face other extenuating circumstances that warrant consideration.
The most crucial element in these discussions is honesty. Few people are without mistakes from their childhood. However, it is important to be open and allow potential partners to choose whether they can accept past transgressions, rather than hidden truths that undermine trust.
Forgiveness is a fundamental principle in Christianity. Through Jesus, all past sins are forgiven, and couples are expected to forgive each other as well. As stated in 1 Peter 4:8, love covers a multitude of sins. Entering into marriage requires a pure heart, which involves openly sharing embarrassing pasts and setting a clear plan for moving on. This honesty is essential for the success of future marriages.
It appears that the expectation of chastity often falls more heavily on women than on men. For example, a woman’s virginity might be compromised by a married man, while the Bible is largely silent on polygamy, indicating that men may bear the blame for marrying unmarried women who have been sexually seduced. However, biblical records typically depict men of faith as having multiple wives, while the opposite is rarely noted.
Effective communication is vital among partners. Transparency is critical; dishonesty can lead to marital breakdowns. Failing to disclose previous sexual relationships can jeopardize a marriage. Adulterous unions are deemed sinful because such actions lack love. When dealing with infidelity, forgiveness should come with a commitment to sever ties with past indiscretions.
Divorcing an unfaithful spouse while marrying another person, when that spouse is still alive, results in both partners sharing the sin of adultery according to Scripture. True Christianity should not allow sexual passions to override the imperative for honesty and fidelity. Love, as a genuine concern, should place the other person’s well-being before one’s own, and dishonesty should be treated similarly to fornication.
In instances where hidden truths emerge after children have been born, legal considerations must prioritize the children’s welfare. While there are various reasons for marital discord, only adultery or deceit prior to marriage can justify divorce.
Adultery is a significant challenge within Christianity. The Old Testament prescribed severe punishments for adulterers, including the death penalty (Leviticus 20:10 NIV). However, Jesus’ teachings emphasize love and forgiveness, allowing for mercy despite the seriousness of the sin.
Under God’s strict laws, adultery was a grave offense, but the sacrifice of Jesus brings a balance of justice and mercy, even in complex situations. God’s disapproval of adultery carries substantial weight, as demonstrated through the suffering of Christ.
If a man is married to a woman who frequently engages in adulterous behavior, it may indicate deeper spiritual issues. Christianity provides guidance on addressing such severe matters—sometimes, prayer and fasting can lead to three possible outcomes.
Firstly, one’s actions may influence the situation, as emphasized by Peter: “Wives, in the same way, submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. True beauty lies not in outward appearances but in the inner self, leading to a transformative impact on relationships” (1 Peter 3:1–4).
Secondly, effective communication can help couples resolve their issues and commit to avoiding similar mistakes in the future. In a loving environment, open confessions can address deep-seated marital problems and promote healing. The principle of forgiving one another also fosters humility, which is a key aspect of Christianity. Pride often seeks to maintain an outward persona, leading to spiritual death, while the inward self is meant for eternity. Christianity offers a pathway to forgiveness that leads to healing and restoration.
“Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed” (James 5:16 NIV).
The third possibility is that an adulterer should be allowed to leave rather than being forced to stay when their commitment lies elsewhere. A righteous man or woman cannot endure the presence of an evil person. The adulterer may feel uncomfortable being near a virtuous person. Their voluntary departure provides the offended spouse with the freedom to move on.
“But if the unbeliever leaves, let it be so. The brother or the sister is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace” (1 Corinthians 7:15 NIV).
The departure of an unbelieving spouse does not allow the believing spouse to remarry. As long as the unbelieving spouse is alive, the believer cannot pursue another marriage. Being married under those circumstances would be considered an act of adultery. According to the biblical viewpoint, only death releases someone from their marital obligations. Even if one’s spouse is unfaithful and refuses to change, they are still considered married.
The believer should continue to pray for the unfaithful spouse and care for their well-being as much as possible. Domestic violence can complicate these situations, often with the aggrieved spouse being drawn into unhealthy patterns. It takes two to create conflict. “A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger” (Proverbs 15:1). This should not be interpreted as condoning violence; rather, it suggests that a peaceful approach can help mitigate aggressive behavior.
Christianity bears a responsibility to foster positive change in the environment, starting with good marriages. While many view divorce as a solution to complicated marital problems, this perspective is misguided. The issues facing humanity today largely stem from a high rate of divorce. Although divorce might seem like an attractive way to resolve problems, it often leads to more difficulties for future generations.
It should be noted that Christianity is not a guarantee of happy marriages; however, it can be a blessing for the unconverted spouse. Not all marital challenges can be easily resolved. Effective communication is key to understanding the dynamics of each situation. Solutions often begin with the recognition that the other person is inherently not different from oneself. Regardless of gender or racial background, we are fundamentally similar as human beings, but only different in attitudes. How does one address difficult situations?
We are responsible for each other. Problems can often be resolved when individuals treat one another with empathy. For example, husbands should strive to understand their wives’ feelings, while wives should make an effort to comprehend their husbands’ perspectives. The most significant lesson in Christianity is that being a Christian is not about personal comfort. Instead, it is about making a positive impact in a troubled world.
Christianity prioritizes sacrifice for other people over physical enjoyment. A true Christian lives by the principle of always asking, “Have most people been glad that I lived?” This question reflects altruism and is central to the Christian faith. It differs from the self-centered inquiry, “Have I been happy that I lived?” The latter often contributes to creating a challenging environment on earth, and nothing else brings problems.
Jesus is depicted as the bridegroom, with the Church as His bride. Unlike unfaithful husbands on earth, Jesus embodies the ultimate faithful bridegroom, perfecting His bride through His own sacrifice. A good husband is one who protects his wife and embraces her imperfections, following the example set by Jesus Christ. Ultimately, Christianity is not about seeking blessings for oneself but about being a blessing to others.
The entire Book of Ecclesiastes illustrates the futility of pursuing enjoyment in life without God. It tells the story of a man who had access to everything needed for peace and happiness. However, the book is filled with a sense of futility as it reflects on the transient nature of physical life. It concludes with a powerful exhortation: “Now all has been heard; here is the conclusion of the matter: Fear God and keep his commandments, for this is the duty of all mankind. For God will bring every deed into judgment, including every hidden thing, whether it is good or evil” (Ecclesiastes 12:13–14 NIV).
Andrew Masuku is the author of Dimensions of a New Civilisation, which lays out standards for lifting Zimbabwe out of its current economic depression and into a model for other nations worldwide. A decaying tree provides an opportunity for a blossoming sprout. Written from a Christian perspective, the book is a product of inspiration, offering relief to those who have witnessed the strings of unworkable solutions leading to the current economic and social decay. Most Zimbabweans should find the book to be a long-awaited providential oasis of hope, in a simple conversational tone.
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